#	FARB
#
#	Generate farberism
#
#	Ralph E. Griswold
#
#	Last modified 2/1/86
#
#

#  This program is broken into procedures in an arbitrary way to allow
#  it to be translated on computers with limited address spaces.
#

procedure main()
   &random := map(&clock,":","0")
   write(??[farb1(),farb2(),farb3(),farb4()])
end

procedure farb1()
   return [
      "I enjoy his smiling continence.",
      "Picasso wasn't born in a day.",
      "I'll be there with spades on.",
      "Beware a Trojan bearing a horse.",
      "A hand in the bush is worth two anywhere else.",
      "All the lemmings are going home to roost.",
      "Anybody who marries her would stand out like a sore thumb.",
      "Before they made him they broke the mold.",
      "He's casting a red herring on the face of the water.",
      "Clean up or fly right.",
      "Come down off your charlie horse.",
      "Don't burn your bridges until you come to them.",
      "Don't count your chickens until the barn door is closed.",
      "Don't do anything I wouldn't do standing up in a hammock.",
      "Don't get your eye out of joint.",
      "Don't just stand there like a sitting duck.",
      "Don't look a mixed bag in the mouth.",
      "Don't look at me in that tone of voice.",
      "Don't make a molehill out of a can of beans.",
      "Don't make a tempest out of a teapot."
      ]
end

procedure farb2()
   return [
      "Don't upset the apple pie.",
      "Every cloud has a blue horizon.",
      "She's faster than the naked eye.",
      "Feather your den with somebody else's nest.",
      "From here on up, it's down hill all the way.",
      "Go fly your little red wagon somewhere else.",
      "Half a worm is better than none.",
      "He doesn't know which side his head is buttered on.",
      "He has feet of molasses.",
      "He hit the nose right on the head.",
      "He knows which side his pocketbook is buttered on.",
      "He smokes like a fish.",
      "He was hoisted by a skyhook on his own petard!",
      "He was putrified with fright.",
      "He would forget his head if it weren't screwed up.",
      "He's as happy as a pig at high tide.",
      "He's been living off his laurels for years.",
      "He's got a rat's nest by the tail.",
      "He's got four sheets in the wind.",
      "He's letting ground grow under his feet.",
      "He's lying through his britches.",
      "He's procrastinating like a bandit.",
      "He's reached the crescent of his success.",
      "He's so far above me I can't reach his bootstraps.",
      "He's too smart for his own bootstraps.",
      "His foot is in his mouth up to his ear.",
      "History is just a repetition of the past.",
      "I apologize on cringed knees.",
      "I don't know which dagger to clothe it in.",
      "I hear the handwriting on the wall.",
      "I wouldn't marry her with a twenty-foot pole.",
      "I'll procrastinate when I get around to it.",
      "I'm going to throw myself into the teeth of the gamut.",
      "I'm parked somewhere in the boondoggles."
      ]
end

procedure farb3()
   return [
      "I'm walking on cloud nine.",
      "I've got to put my duff to the grindstone.",
      "I've had it up to the hilt.",
      "If Calvin Coolidge were alive today, he'd turn over in his grave.",
      "If the onus fits, wear it.",
      "Is he an Amazon!",
      "It fills a well-needed gap.",
      "It is better to have tried and failed than never to have failed at all.",
      "It looks like it's going to go on ad infinitum for a while.",
      "It sounds like roses to my ears.",
      "It's a caterpillar in pig's clothing.",
      "It's a fiat accompli.",
      "It's a fool's paradise wrapped in sheep's clothing.",
      "It's a monkey wrench in your ointment.",
      "It's a new high in lows.",
      "It's bouncing like a greased pig.",
      "It's enough to make you want to rot your socks.",
      "It's like talking to a needle in a haystack.",
      "It's like trying to light a fire under a lead camel.",
      "It's not his bag of tea.",
      "It's so unbelieveable you wouldn't believe it.",
      "Just because it's there, you don't have to mount it.",
      "Keep your ear peeled!",
      "Let's not drag any more dead herrings across the garden path.",
      "Let's skin another can of worms.",
      "Look at the camera and say `bird'.",
      "Look before you turn the other cheek.",
      "Men, women, and children first!",
      "Necessity is the mother of strange bedfellows.",
      "Never feed a hungry dog an empty loaf of bread.",
      "No rocks grow on Charlie.",
      "No sooner said, the better.",
      "Nobody could fill his socks.",
      "Nobody is going to give you the world in a saucer.",
      "Nobody marches with the same drummer.",
      "Not by the foggiest stretch of the imagination!",
      "Not in a cocked hat, you don't!",
      "People in glass houses shouldn't call the kettle black.",
      "Put it on the back of the stove and let it simper."
      ]
end

procedure farb4()
   return [
      "Put the onus on the other foot.",
      "Rome wasn't built on good intentions alone.",
      "She has eyes like two holes in a burnt blanket.",
      "She's a virgin who has never been defoliated.",
      "She's trying to feather her own bush.",
      "Somebody's flubbing his dub.",
      "It's steel wool and a yard wide.",
      "Straighten up or fly right.",
      "Strange bedfellows flock together.",
      "That's a bird of a different color.",
      "That's a horse of a different feather.",
      "That's a sight for deaf ears.",
      "That's the way the old ball game bounces.",
      "The die has been cast on the face of the waters.",
      "The early bird will find his can of worms.",
      "The foot that rocks the cradle is usually in the mouth.",
      "The onus is on the other foot.",
      "The whole thing is a hairy potpourri.",
      "There are enough cooks in the pot already.",
      "There's a dark cloud on every rainbow's horizon.",
      "There's a flaw in the ointment.",
      "There's going to be hell and high water to pay.",
      "They don't stand a teabag's chance in hell.",
      "They sure dipsied his doodle.",
      "This ivory tower we're living in is a glass house.",
      "Time and tide strike but once.",
      ]
end